Outback Jack - Episode 5

Where were we? Oh yes, Adrienne, Meri-De, Natalie, Maria and Cortney are waiting to board the plane to Perth, ready for a few days of pampered pleasure. But as JD informed us at the end of the last show, only four of the girls will actually be making the trip. If you need to catch up, check out last week's episode guide. We'll wait.

As this week's show begins, Jack is agonizing over the elimination, and the girls are even more stressed than he is. He peers them over and begins calling names. He asks Natalie to remain. The same goes for Cortney, then Maria. Jack's speeches are getting even more dramatic, as he calls the elimination process cruel and against his nature. What may be even more cruel is what he does next--eliminating Adrienne, the first girl he kissed in the game, only to keep newcomer Meri-De. Jack admits that while he and Adrienne have become good friends, there's no passion there. Adrienne agrees with the friends-only thing, even if the other girls seem to bristle at Jack's inclusion of Meri-De at the expense of their friend. (video)

After the elimination, the girls and Jack climb on the tiny plane and head off to their luxurious vacation in Perth. The girls are bubbling over with excitement. Jack, however, is already dreaming of a return to the Outback.

As the group drives from the airport to downtown Perth, the girls spend the travel time talking about all the things they want to do. Jack spends his time in the limo whining to himself about what he expects to experience over the next few days. Poor Jack, the whining has just begun. The girls and Jack are staying in luxury suites at the Intercontinental Burswood Resort, but they'll be sharing rooms. Cortney is kind enough to share a room with Meri-De, which is nice, because Maria wouldn't have. "She's not one of us," Maria opines.

The first thing the ladies do is check out their suites, screaming like schoolgirls at all of the amenities. They jump on the beds, run around in robes, and even climb in the empty bath to re-enact scenes from "Pretty Woman." They're seemingly amazed by everything, from the big, bug-free balcony to the flushable toilets. Of course, the fresh fruit and cold champagne is one of the highlights of their luxury suites.

The girls grab Jack and head to the Burswood Spa for his makeover. Jack has no clue what a "makeover" is (he must not watch American cable television), but he expects the worst. His humiliation starts early, when he's asked to change into a robe and bikini briefs. Jack prefers to go without the briefs. "I want to have kids someday," he states, tossing the skimpy undies aside. Is he going commando? Don't get excited, he's wearing his own boxer briefs.

Jack doesn't enjoy a single aspect of his spa experience. He says of the exfoliation: "How do women put up with this crap?" About the seaweed wrap: "Aw, come on! This is murder!" And in regards to the eyebrow plucking: "Agh! What the hell was that?" The girls manage to shut him out as much as possible. "Jack is going to be very difficult to train," Natalie admits, looking to the future.

Next, Jack's subjected to what even the spa staff calls "the chamber of torture." You know that's not a good sign. Yes, it's time for a back waxing. In his defense, Jack doesn't squeal like a girl. He doesn't even flinch. Ironically, the most painful procedure of the day is the one thing that doesn't bother him. He seems to take the pain as a challenge, and endures it without complaint. (video)

Jack endures the rest of the treatment, including the manicure and pedicure, but admits that it's not his cup of tea. "And I thought life in the Outback was hard..." he states.

After their spa experience is over, most of the girls are upstairs relaxing. Most, but not all. The enterprising Maria is on her way to Jack's suite. "I shouldn't be doing this. I'm a bad girl," she states, as she saunters down the hall in her sexy black dress and heels. What did they get up to? We'll never know, as Jack closed his room door on the camera crew. At least we know Maria paid Jack a visit. The other contestants don't even know about the late night rendezvous.

The next day, it's time to take Jack shopping. The girls all look fabulous, while Jack still has his Outback style. Which is to say, he's in jeans, boots, and a hat, as usual. The day is a blur, as Jack is whisked from one boutique to the next, trying on clothes and pretending to be interested in it all. "Jack's good at hunting and protecting," Natalie confesses. "We're good at shopping." Throughout the day, Maria is constantly inches away from Jack--a technique that the other girls aren't blind to. Meri-De and Cortney each comment on Maria's efforts at marking her territory.

After the shopping mercifully ends, each girl gets to take Jack on her own private date. Maria asks Jack to do some yoga ("In the Outback, we call that stretching," Jack states). Their conversation is flirtatious, but Maria finally admits to the cameras that their get-together the previous evening didn't get as intimate as she would've liked. The other girls would probably be happy to know this...if they knew about the encounter in the first place. Things heat up again on this date, however, and the date ends with much kissing. "She's stepped up a notch or two," Jack says about their date. (video)

Next, it's Meri-De's turn. She and Jack enjoy a scooter ride together, and head out to the park for a picnic. Meri-De finally gets a Crocodile Dundee joke in (it's about time), before she and Jack start to get serious. The bond between these two is obvious and instantaneous. Could she outlast the original girls? She manages to get her first kiss before Natalie and Cortney do, which has to be a good sign. "I'm so glad that Jack's realized that I'm the type of girl he needs," she says. "He needs a strong woman, not a pampered city girl." (video)

Jack soon joins Cortney for their date in a revolving rooftop restaurant that allows a view of the entire city. Cortney immediately gets serious, trying to figure out what Jack's feeling. She admits that she's not the aggressive type, but her passive approach seems to be working on Jack. Last time they were together on a date, Cortney gave Jack the cheek when he leaned in for a kiss. This time, she shares several smooches with the object of her affection. Jack doesn't seem to know what to do, however. "I connect so well with each of the four girls remaining," he says, "that each time I'm with one of them, it feels like she's the one." (video)

Natalie's date is much different than the others'. She takes Jack to a club/gallery, where she looks right at home, though he looks slightly less than comfortable. Once they're there, Jack asks Natalie how she feels about him (now that's a role reversal). Natalie opens up and admits that she's into Jack, and even gets to wear his special necklace. Of course, a gesture like that deserves a kiss. Jack pulls off the grand slam, kissing each of the four girls on each of their dates. (video)

Meanwhile, somewhere else in Australia, Marissa lounges by a pool with a drink in her hand. "Have a good time now, ladies," she states. "I'll be back soon." She adds, "The only thing I regret is not being able to kick Adrienne's butt out of the Outback myself."

When the dates are over, the entire group meets with JD in the hotel lobby. JD reminds them all that Jack will be eliminating one more contestant in the morning, before the remaining girls return to the Outback. When morning comes, JD has yet another twist. He offers the girls a deal: Any of them can decide right now to stay in Perth to be pampered for two weeks, all expenses paid. The catch is that they'll have to leave the competition for good if they decide to take the luxurious vacation. JD reminds the girls that one of them will soon be eliminated anyway. "It's be awfully nice to spend two weeks in a luxury hotel before heading back home," JD urges. Surprisingly, none of them bite. For one of these girls, the decision may soon become one she regrets.

The girls reconvene with Jack, who knew nothing of the choice JD presented them. He learns that all of them chose to give up two weeks of luxury for his sake. There's nothing like adding to the stress and guilt he's going to feel when he eliminates another contestant.

As the elimination ceremony begins, Jack calls each girl up, one at a time, and lets them know their fates. Meri-De is the first to receive a pass to the next round. The next one goes to Maria. Finally, it's between Cortney and Natalie, both of whom opened up to Jack during their individual dates. Which girl made the biggest impression? Apparently, it was Natalie, who's invited to return to the Outback. Poor Cortney, turning down a vacation for a chance at romance, only to be sent home empty-handed. (Editor's note: Cortney was my personal fave, so this was an emotional moment for me. I teared up a little while writing this recap. Ironically, so did all three of the other girls--including newcomer Meri-De.) (video)

The fifth episode comes to a close as Jack and the girls return to camp. Natalie immediately needs help with invading insects, while Maria marvels at how well she's been doing with the dirt and bugs. Speaking of bugs, Host JD soon "bugs" the girls with another surprise. "You're not the only ones who've decided to return to camp," he says, as Marissa walks in looking absolutely gorgeous, and as bitchy as ever. "I had a big pit in my stomach when she walked in," Maria confesses. "She's the one girl that Jack didn't eliminate..."

"Now that I'm back," Marissa promises, "it's going to be a whole new game."